I just came out of yet another thrilling Toastmaster Session and I was the Joke-Master of the day.
As a joke master I was supposed to make audience laugh and I chose to use " 7 Habbits of Highly ineffective people. "
It went pretty well, so thought to share the write up with you all too.... Here you go...
Joke Master : TM session 23
I am sure you’ve all read or at least heard about seven habits of highly effective people as explained by renowned writer Steven R Covey.
But I am not sure if you’ve also heard of 7 habits of highly ineffective people by even more renowned writer – TM Shashi. So today I’d enlighten you by those 7 habits of highly ineffective people.
Seven habits of highly ineffective people.
1.) The nosy habit.
Its simple, the people with nosy habit believe that there is a hidden treasure inside their nose and hence try to explore it whenever they get time to.
People do this when they nervous but I do this every time I get nervous and its only when I;ve found some treasure that I realize that what I was doing ?
If you follow cricket, one player who strongly believes in the treasure in the nose is Sourav Ganguly, you can often find him doing this [ Finger in the nose] and the cameraman has to take the focus off immediately. The worst thing about Ganguly is that he also does this after the nosy act. [ Put the same finger in mouth to bite nails ]
2.) The second habit of highly ineffective people is “The ultimate itch” ,
People with this habit exhibit excellent itching sense.
There are types of itching – I don’t know itching – Head.
I don’t know but I am pretending that I know itching. – Chin.
I did not take bath itching – Underarms and chest.
And the socially unacceptable – the sachin tendulkar itching.
3.) Better late than ever. Habbit.
They think that “Being late is glorious” and hence they would always come late. If there is a meeting at 3PM, they will enter at 3:20PM.
Now its not their mistake that they think being late is glorious. Because it is.
Suppose Harish is taking up an all hands and all the employees are listening to him, and this highly ineffective person enters just 30mins late, what will happen , - everybody will look at him and even harish will look at him.
Nobody would have even noticed this poor chap if only he was on time. Of course – being late is glorious.
4.) The fourth habbit is – pretend you know everything.
You can ask such people anything you like – and they will act like encyclopedia for you.
Do you know who is Michael Schumacher ? Of course, I know her.
Do you know what is a software ? – Dude – what do you think am I wearing?
Do you follow IPL ? Of course I follow IPL and Germany is my favorite team.
5.) The fifth habit is that they think 5=7.
you see these were the 7 habits of a highly ineffective person.