Monday, September 28, 2009

Men's Brain vs. Women's Brain

Just a little over a year ago, I watched a stand-up comedy videos of controversial George Carlin. He made my laugh my heads off! and dutifully posted at LOL. And then suddenly the news came that he died. I couldn't help wonder about the connection.

Now, thanks for Facebook, I discovered another guy Mark Gungor and man is he humorous? Just check out the video!



Way to go Mark! (...and be careful :D)

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Indianized Twinckle Twinkle little star

Just take a look at the following video! Its hillarious!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmdAF4ihedM

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

May or May not

I was bumping my head with a technical training yesterday and I found a hint, that is supposed to help me wade through materials that were for practical purposes Greek and Latin.

"Hint: The datasheet may or may not be useful to you"

Now I was thinking,

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? That is always going be the case right? If there is a datasheet, no matter what you are trying to figure out, the datasheet is going to have only two roles to play!

1) It may be useful to you!
2) It may not be useful to you!

Besides, isn't it enough if it is just "Hint: The datasheet may be useful to you"? Doesn't the word "may" add enough uncertainity? Why go for the "may or may not" overkill? Just so you confuse the reader to the maximum now that you have started of with it anyway?!

Whoever wrote it must have been thinking, "If I wrote just "may"... oops I have just given too much away with the hint!. Buuuuuuuuut if I had just used "may not", I would have turned the user away from the datasheet and that robs me an opportunity to play with his mind. So, I will say "MAY OR MAY NOT!" How delicious. Now that is going to put a spin on his head! Haa Haa Haa"

Now, if I ever meet Mr. May O'Maynot, I would say "I may or may not throw a rock or lathe on your head or toe while you may or may not be sleeping or awake! How about that!"

Friday, July 24, 2009

Double Entendre

While Aish, Amitabh and Abhishek seem to have made a meal out of the opportunity to "show" off in front of the camera after they have voted, Greg Chappell must be wondering what was all the fuss in the media when he did the same thing a few years back! :)

PS: Just look at Amitabh a little closer! He seems to fully realize the double entendre

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Priest, Vodka and Holy shit!

It has been sometime since I had a laugh that replicates well on a blog post. But this forward from a friend who sure does filter what he forwards meticulously, sure qualifies! What an entertainer! Enjoy!

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, 'When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.'
So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous
and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not
beat his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the
late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.
8) David slew Goliath; he did not kick the shit out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.
10) We do not refer to the cross as the 'Big T.'
11) When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, 'Take this and eat it for this is my body.' He did not say 'Eat me'.
12) The Virgin Mary is not called 'Mary with the
Cherry'.
13) The recommended grace before a meal is not Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.
14) Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St.Peter's not a peter pulling contest

at St.Taffy's.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Animals and friends!

A friend and colleague of mine recently became a member of Toastmaster's club in my office. For the unaware, once a member one is supposed to deliver a series of talks refining each aspect of communication skill with every talk. The first one, the ice breaker, is always a talk introducing oneself and providing a brief personal history to the rest of the club.

What she said (hopefully didn't intend) during the course of her speech got me to thinking on "what I really am!". She said.

"I like animals a lot. I like to surround myself with animals. Ask my friends!"

...and I sit next to her at work!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Qute a distance!

The recent PJ that worked out my abdominal muscles!

A guy meets an old friend and here is how the conversation goes

Guy: Hey dude, Its been a long time. The last I saw you was on your wedding!
Old Friend: Ya! Now I have a daughter and it has been 6 months since she has started walking!
Guy: Wow! She must have covered quite a distance now!
OF: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Ethiopia

These days no matter what I do the conversation naturally slides to how I am lost because I am preoccupied with something (rather somebody) else in mind. :D I try to fend them off as much as possible. But it is only a matter of time before I give up and let my colleagues walk all over me with their taunts! What is the point anyway? They are not always wrong quite honestly! :)

But today was a little different and for once I got off the hook fast! I was having lunch with three of my colleagues over some trivial matter when I got a reminder from my mobile. As I paid attention towards it I fumbled up with a reply. Assuming that to be an SMS from "Her" my colleagues grabbed the chance.

"Now there is no point talking to Badhri", mentioned JJ

"Ya, he is in his own world", giggled RS!

"Ya, Ethiopia", said RVD

I said, "Its Utopia not Ethiopia! and look who is lost!" :)

Friday, January 9, 2009

The Satyam Connection

Every one is writing a blog about the Satyam fiasco (I am going to do that after this one). I found this piece of poetry on one of the blogs on Livemint.

Raju Raju? Yes, papa.
Missing assets? No, papa.
Unnecessarily trying to acquire a real estate company to save your skin?
No, papa.
Okay, show me your balance sheet!
Ha ha ha.

This has again been tagged as sadist. Reason, I was a Satyamite and I know many.