7 Habbits of Highly ineffective people.

Hey All,

I just came out of yet another thrilling Toastmaster Session and I was the Joke-Master of the day.
As a joke master I was supposed to make audience laugh and I chose to use " 7 Habbits of Highly ineffective people. "

It went pretty well, so thought to share the write up with you all too.... Here you go...

Joke Master : TM session 23

I am sure you’ve all read or at least heard about seven habits of highly effective people as explained by renowned writer Steven R Covey.

But I am not sure if you’ve also heard of 7 habits of highly ineffective people by even more renowned writer – TM Shashi. So today I’d enlighten you by those 7 habits of highly ineffective people.

Seven habits of highly ineffective people.

1.) The nosy habit.

Its simple, the people with nosy habit believe that there is a hidden treasure inside their nose and hence try to explore it whenever they get time to.

People do this when they nervous but I do this every time I get nervous and its only when I;ve found some treasure that I realize that what I was doing ?

If you follow cricket, one player who strongly believes in the treasure in the nose is Sourav Ganguly, you can often find him doing this [ Finger in the nose] and the cameraman has to take the focus off immediately. The worst thing about Ganguly is that he also does this after the nosy act. [ Put the same finger in mouth to bite nails ]

2.) The second habit of highly ineffective people is “The ultimate itch” ,

People with this habit exhibit excellent itching sense.

There are types of itching – I don’t know itching – Head.

I don’t know but I am pretending that I know itching. – Chin.

I did not take bath itching – Underarms and chest.

And the socially unacceptable – the sachin tendulkar itching.

3.) Better late than ever. Habbit.

They think that “Being late is glorious” and hence they would always come late. If there is a meeting at 3PM, they will enter at 3:20PM.

Now its not their mistake that they think being late is glorious. Because it is.

Suppose Harish is taking up an all hands and all the employees are listening to him, and this highly ineffective person enters just 30mins late, what will happen , - everybody will look at him and even harish will look at him.

Nobody would have even noticed this poor chap if only he was on time. Of course – being late is glorious.

4.) The fourth habbit is – pretend you know everything.

You can ask such people anything you like – and they will act like encyclopedia for you.

Do you know who is Michael Schumacher ? Of course, I know her.

Do you know what is a software ? – Dude – what do you think am I wearing?

Do you follow IPL ? Of course I follow IPL and Germany is my favorite team.

5.) The fifth habit is that they think 5=7.

you see these were the 7 habits of a highly ineffective person.

Nature of job 3 of 3

Alright here is the final one nature of job.
This happened to one my friend working in Motorola in software dept.

He was supposed to take a flight from Begumpet airport to Bangalore, he directly went to the airport from work and in the process forgot to take of the company batch off from his belt lock.

He entered the security checking area and the personnel who was stamping the bag - tags happened to see the batch - "MOTOROLA", and asked - "so your work for Motorola ?

Yes replied the friend,

I've a Motorola cell that is consuming lot of battery and is not catching the signals properly and you should take a look at it !!!!!!

The security personnel kept complaining about all the feature about some old Motorola Model and grew quite aggressive thinking that this is the person who must be responsible for all the trouble he faced !!!!!

He almost had him for dinner before my friend somehow managed to escape.
But he almost had to apologize before leaving, for the dirty condition -Motorola cell.

Nature of job 2 of 3

Following happened to other colleauge (Vijay) yesterday :-

Somebody happened to have visited him, I'll call him Mr. Dingu.

Mr. Dingu got interested in the kind of job that we do at Synopsys.
To make it simple, Vijay replied " We work on chip design and related softwares ".

Mr. Dingu inquired with genuine curiosity - " so what's hot in chip design these days ? "

Vijay actively replied - " Power !!! Now a days low power designs are critical . Power seem to be the key challenge for the chips to come !! "

The discussion went on for around 10 mins and Vijay was very happy to have found some one who actually understands "nature of his job" !!!!
but he was taken aback by this statement of Mr. Dingu after a long discussion on low power design challenges in VLSI

" Oh Now I understand, why Reliance Power is investing so much money in Taiwan "

Nature of Job - 1 of 3

With IT revolution in India, one thing that has become difficult is " how do I explain my job to others ? "

Especially with the job that I do at synopsys that entitles us as " Support Center Engineer !!!"

Few days back one my collegue's wife recommended him to quite Synopsys and rather join a Call center like Wipro or ICICI !!!!

for most of mortals, all support centers are call centers....

Community Service

Ok, Excellent posts so far !!!
Hats off to all contributors. i'll contribute one of my all time favorite - Poke ( Practical Joke ;) )

Just like any one of us, Mr. Dingu is also inclined to serve the community and help others.
I met Mr. Dingu to see how committed he is for his community service.

If you've 2 televisions, would you donate one to a poor family ? , I asked.
Yes, of course replied Mr. Dingu.

that's great, if you've 2 cars, would you donate one to any NGO in need of one ?
Sure, answered Mr. Dingu.

Ok, if you've two cows, I am sure you'll also donate one Cow to a farmer in need ?
No !!! came the answer in a splash, to my surprise.

But Why ? you seem to be so generous, I inquired in awe.
Mr. Dingu calmly replied,

"It's because, I neither have two cars nor have 2 televisions, but I do have 2 Cows !!! "